Oops

If I've learned one thing in life, it's that God has incredible timing and a sick sense of humor. I can remember days when I would say...What a (something or other) - look at them riding a motorcycle in shorts. Ironically I never say anything about short sleeves or no sleeves. That's okay but bare legs, well that's wrong.

So this morning, I'm getting dressed to ride to work. Tshirt, shorts, boots. I'm ready. Husband says...shorts, to which I quickly answer Chaps. Time to leave grows closer and I've made no effort to get my chaps out.

The weatherman says 50 degrees and I know how cold 55mph is at 50 degrees. My rain suit jacket is on the bike, I'll be fine. So I saddle up, shorts, socks and boots. Socks by Nautica, boots by Harley Davidson. I swear I'm a living breathing juxtaposition.

Made it to work, only burned my leg once, that damn primary cover gets a bit warm. But the temperature was fine. I snuck in the back door at work, changed into the politically correct work uniform and away I went.

Quitting time rolled around and it's time to ride back home. Biker boots and sailor socks....short-sleeved shirt and gloves. For some reason, 30 degrees or 90 degrees, I can't ride without gloves - there's another story in there somewhere.

So I'm minding my own business riding on Tuttle Crossing. The minding my own business part is important as I usually try to sneek up on people who are talking on the phone and not paying attention, pull the clutch, roll the throttle and drown out their conversation. But none of that today, I was a sound ordinance obeying, speed limit minding girl in shorts on Harley.

Then I heard it, that sound. The sound of brakes locking and months of good tire rubber being laid down in a single patch. In a car you look in the rear view mirror and hope that you're not their intended target. On a bike, well, you try to look as many places as you can and hope like hell you're not the intended target.

I wasn't the target of this tire screecher, I was the cause. Moral of the story - wear pants when riding...less distracting.

Perfect Dog

Thirteen years ago, I visited the Humane Society, looking for a puppy.  I was fortunate to be there when there were puppies available.  I walked into a room full of cages and found a little brown ball in the back corner of his cage. 

He had a litter mate in with him who was up in front showing off.  Always one to fall for the underdog, I reached in and picked up Jake.  That was the name the HS had given to him.  The only time I set him down was to sign the paperwork, and then I had put him in my purse.

When I brought Jake to the vet for his first visit, he weighed 1.5#.  Today he's comfortably in the 70# range.  Jake has been through and seen a lot in his 13 years.  He has quite a few fans who take joy in seeing him.

I didn't name him perfect dog, that was my father.  I knew that I wanted a big dog, but I also knew that I had to have a well trained big dog, so as not to scare children and knock down the elderly.  Jake had a private tutor, Mark Frederick.  He's responsible for turning Jake into the joy that he is. 

The day is coming soon when I will have to say goodbye, but I know that it won't be forever.  Disney said so, and I know it's true.  Jake will be pain free one day, waiting at the Rainbow Bridge for me.

Jakey, I know one day soon you will let me know that you're ready to cross over, I will respect your wish.  You're very loved my friend!

Miley Photos

The thing about writing in a blog that makes it really inconvenient is that you can only publish your ideas at the computer.  So when your mind wanders through all these great things to ponder, one forgets them all because there's no keyboard.

The Miley Cyrus photo story has yet to die.  I saw the pictures on one of the day's morning shows.  The headline that I found particularly amusing is the one asking if Miley is on track to become the next Brittany  Spears.  My answer to that....Nope, never going to happen.

The the other side argues, she's got pictures of her naked.  Now to me naked is more of a OH MY, did you see that.  Not the, damn that's a beautiful photograph thing.

I will say this, if Annie Lebowitz called and wanted to photograph my kids, I would ask her when and where.  If clothes are optional then so be it.  The opportunity for my kids to be published in a book along side Queen Elizabeth II would be top of mind, not if my kid is going to be starring in Spears Train Wreck 2. 

Miley on the cover of Vanity Fair with her dad.  Much better than on the front of the Enquirer because mom can't have her parenting book published anymore.

Suffice to say, if Annie calls, the kids will come running.

Mental Muscle

For quite some time, I was under the impression that I was a fairly intelligent person.  So much so, I signed up to take the online Jeopardy contestant screening test.  That test abruptly put an end to my smarty pants attitude.

That attitude does rear it's ugly head every now and then though.  Mostly when the incompetent tell me I'm wrong.  I don't tell them that Jeopardy knows that I can be wrong quite often, but you can't argue with technology, can you?

My favorite, which I ran into again this morning is, "It can't be wrong, I wrote the code."  That's akin to my, "It can't possibly be spelled wrong, I sounded it out."  When one learns to read phonetically, there are a lot of interesting ways to spell words.

Now I hear that Obama promises to change Washington if he's elected.  What exactly does he thing he'll be able to change in 4 years.  Is he going to change the senate & house healthcare plans?  Good luck, Oh that's right, Obama promised to give those without health insurance a program that's as good as the one Washington enjoys. 

Them are some big words black man.  I know what they enjoy as far as health insurance...who's going to pay this premium for all those who cannot pay to have health insurance.

I've come to the realization that I'm a mean person.  When someone really irks me...Like thinking he can do my job better than me, I tend to take great joy in making his life miserable, which is terrible...fun

Gratitude

In my off time, I teach religious education to seventh grade students at my local church.  Every month or so, the children were asked to write a prayer on a specific subject.  Yesterday we received the book of prayers to pass to the students.

I read through the prayers first and found a couple topics of discussion.  One such topic was to thank God for their parents.  So I opened the floor to the topic.  I asked the children what they could do to show their parents that they were grateful for them.

I heard NOTHING.  One boy said he could thank them.  I then asked what he would thank them for.  Again, nothing.  Finally fed up with their inability to say...Make my bed without asking...I passed out paper and pencils and had the kids write their parents a letter expressing their gratitude.

I did not read them, instead I passed out envelopes to mail the letters.  I just don't understand why it's so hard to express gratitude to parents.  I must admit though that I didn't write a note for my parents, but I still reserve the right to do so.

One thing that I do though is kiss my father good bye every time I leave him.  The second common thread in the children's prayers was world peace.  I asked my uncle what his theory of world peace was.  His answer, as always was priceless...

Anyone who is part of a family unit or works for a living knows there will never be world peace.

With gratitude I tell him, "I couldn't have said it better."

To have a blog...

You have to write.  I've heard of may people talking about "their blog." My blog this, my blog that.  So off I ran to create a blog.  I wanted this to be available to Sarah too, so she had a creative outlet and could join the My Blog generation.  I haven't told her about the blog yet, as I'm still trying to figure out how to make it go. 

When I first created my blog, I had all of these great ideas for writing.  Politics, now there's a subject that I could go on and on about.  The neatest thing about politics is that it's reflected to the general public by journalists.  I cannot think of two greater wordsmith to be working together.  Journalist check their facts and politicians spin their facts, so how does a journalist check up on a spun fact? 

The best quote coming out of today is the creator(?) of BET, that's BLACK Entertainment network, said that if Obama wasn't black, he wouldn't be running for President.  Oh sure, Mrs Ferarro states the obvious and she gets booed, but...I best check to see if it's a fact, spun fact or miss quoted.

Out of context, what a defense.  That's not what I meant, they took the statement out of context.  If you don't want to be noted as saying that the sky is falling, then don't tell me that it was raining so hard, the sky was falling.  Don't blame your speech writer - it's your responsibility at the Orator to check those freaking facts.

For now though, I must end my oration.  I'm not quite sure what search word will put the verbosity upon your desktop, but please, leave it in context.

So you want to be THE president

I started writing this a couple times, trying to get my point across but without naming names. Then it hit me...My blog, no reason to be politically correct - especially when I think things are becoming politically incorrect.

So there are two democratic candidates. They're each spending tens of millions of dollars to be elected into a position that pays 90+ percent less than what they're spending to impress us enough to elect them.

They're also spending millions of dollars to tell us how bad the economy is. How can I listen to a millionaire tell me how bad things are. The one that makes me laugh the most is the people who are telling the truth are the ones being asked to resign their positions.

Ms. Ferarro made a matter of fact statement about Obama, resigned. One of Obama's people equated Hillary with a monster...resignation. Obama states that he'll end tax credits for employers eliminating jobs. The taxes that the employer doesn't have to pay are taxed that are paid on behalf of the employee; unemployment, workers comp, etc. He wants to call a halt to these tax "credits" while making sure every American has the same health insurance he has as a member of Congress.

How are we paying for this?